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“Hanging myself,” the blond replies.“It should be around your neck” says the guard.“I tried that,” he replies, “but then I couldn’t br...athe”.( This one actually makes sense ... well, sort of... )An Italian tourist asks a blond man: “Why do Scuba divers always fall backwards off their boats?”To which the blond man replies: “If they fell forward, they’d still be in the boat.”A guy is walking along Whyte Avenue when he comes across a lamp partially buried in a garbage can.He picks up the lamp and. They do sweep it every night before closing time. Off in one corner near the bar, there's a small office slash storeroom, an even smaller kitchen and His and Hers loos. (See, Your Highness, I really do speak your language.) The two bartenders that night were Ric and Frankie. Frankie's a female, real name Francine."Hi Jenny," Ric said. "You're looking spiffy tonight." I could see him staring at my tits and I smiled, giving him silent permission to keep looking. Because of a little beauty mark. But once he got his claws into me, he just kept comingback for more and more, threatening to expose me as his leak at thecompany. I hoped it would all die down, I didn't know it would blow upas it did."She looked at me, pleading with me to believe her."He kept on and on about it. It was getting him some attention from theother newspapers and he couldn't stop. By the time I had got here andmet you, and Areeya and Alex, I stopped feeding him anything. I eventried to warn you as far as I could. He. So I jumped out of the car grabbed the keys from the ignition locked her car and we turned the car around and made our way homeward . The conversation on the way was about how awful cars are and mobile phones and signals our passenger told us her name was Tracy and she was visiting the area alone on a mission to find a nice hotel for her husband’s close approaching birthday. We were soon home and as I pulled up through our gates on to the drive the security lights came on Jill quickly got out.
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