I did however have guys messaging me first, at the time I had no interest, I only wanted women but with a mixture of loneliness and curiosity I starte... to casually send a few messages back.This became a very slippery slope, it would start with a few messages but when the conversation turned sexual I'd have this swell of anxiety and ghost them, I kept telling myself I'm not gay, I have no interest in guy but I kept going back. This time maybe I'd reciprocate, tell them how much I'd like to try. She said Russ just did not pay enough attention to her.“How will I know you will not tell Russ,” she asked. Then she went to talk about that if we had sex I could not tell Russ because he would kill me for having sex with her. She got up and said “Ryan, come in the bedroom and take your clothes off, you are going to lose your virginity this morning. I am going to fuck your brains off and you are not going to tell a soul because if you do I know Russ will kill you because he is such a jealous. I will also add that I grow weary of your moping. The choice is yours, you can dwell on the past and be miserable or you can look at the future and try to make the best of it." Amy's eyes blazed momentarily in anger and then just as quickly softened.Sam hung her head and tears started to fill her eyes and roll down her cheeks. Amy pinched her chin between her fingers lightly and raised Sam's head until their eyes locked. "Be strong, little one. Be strong and you will survive, be weak and you. The posts weren't feminine white-painted things holding up a pretty lace canopy, but instead were large, rough wood columns, at least six inches across.She guided me to stand before her, with my back to the bed. She kissed me hard and deep. I moved to hold her head in my hands, but she pushed them away. She slid down my body, her hands following her lips, and in seconds her fingers were at the waist of my jeans. She didn't just open my belt, but she pulled it out of the loops with a fast, fluid.
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