Eventually . . . but it would have meant the world to me if he’d just said those things months earlier.’ ‘I know,’ Ellen said. ‘I know I mus... . . . and sometimes I start to . . . but then I just can’t . . .’ ‘You don’t want to make it harder for her? Is that it? Your passing and leaving her behind just when you’d become the greatest of friends? That’s what Cal said—that he didn’t want me to think of him too fondly, to feel the loss too harshly.’ ‘Yes . . . yes, precisely,’ Ellen said. ‘Somehow. ”“Intrude? Deb, you’re their mother. How could you intrude?”“I just felt that I would, now get going before you get into that traffic. It will take you another hour to get to the park if you don’t leave soon.”“OK. I’ll go, but when I get home we are going to have a long talk. I love you.” I kissed her and gave her a firm hug, which she returned in kind.I went downstairs to find that the twins had loaded my things in the SUV and were waiting for me. Since I was the last one there, I got the back. I asked about her husband, she said that would not mind me taking her for the movie.We decided to go for the matinee show, which was at 4pm and I told her to be ready. Till this time, I had no bad intention at all. Around 2.45 I went to her house. The door was shut but not latched. I slowly pushed it and looked for her, without making any sound. I was about to reach her bedroom, the door was open and she was dressing.Her back was towards me and she was removing the towel wrapped around her. When we walked into headquarters the operations officer looked at us, "you are alive?"The way he said it made my hair stand up as Dex growled, "what happened to our pick up?"The major glanced around, "we thought you were dead. We did not know the Air Force was going to do a strike until they did it."The way he would not look at us made me think he was lying and I was sure Dex and the others knew. We ignored the after action debriefing and went to clean weapons and put them away. I stopped to.
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