K.”I looked him in the eyes and where there was once hate and vindictiveness there was now…affection. He smiled at me and I found myself no longe... wrapping my arms around him to comfort him but now I was holding his hand and stroking it. I knew I shouldn’t be attracted to him and I was ashamed to be attracted to him, but I was. After a moment of silence, we kissed. I stroked his sandy hair with one hand and grabbed his body with the other. His tongue entered my mouth and I stroked it with. Plus he was bracing himself for when Jen moved away. It didn't matter how much of a bitch he said she was, he still loved her. He always would, he knew. He still thought about her constantly, and still pictured them together. He knew it was ridiculous, but he still couldn't help it. At least now he had the option of seeing her around, but when she moved away he wouldn't ever talk to her again. He wondered what it would be like next year, all the time wondering where she was and what she was. She said it was the most primal and carnal thing she had ever witnessed and she loved every second of it. It wasn’t until recently I shared my activities with anyone else and those were only a couple people online here.Friday came around and I had butterflies in my stomach all day. I was jittery and nervous and after class, I went back to my room to wait on the girls to show up for our weekly ritual. We took our showers and I helped Shave Maddi as she had not decided to wax completely yet. We. To the saddle horse he leads. I hesitate. The sun shines just barely this far, cupping my left heel in it's golden touch. He removes his hand from my flesh. Now I draw in a sputtering, fearful breath. One foot now between my own, his right foot, kicking gently, spreading me apart by degrees. My hands go to the wooden crossbeam before me, as though drawn my a puppeteer's strings. Only the rest of my body shakes now. I want so much to scream out, to ruin this all by pleading for it all to.
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