I couldn’t hold it back. “Beth, I was stupid and wrong. Please let me come in.”“No. You think I’m ugly.” She was bawling and sniffling.“...hat’s not right. I think you’re the prettiest girl in the world. Please let me in.”I heard her walk to the door and unlock it. I went in and I held her as we cried together.“I was stupid. It will never happen again. I love you, just like I said before.”“Then, why?” She asked while still sniffling.“I wanted Tim and the guys to like me, and I was stupid. I mean. I mean, I like it. ButI won't do it if. you don't want me to. I haven't thought this out verywell, have I?" James wiped a tear away from her face."I need to think. What does this mean for you? What does it mean for me?Do you really want to be a girl? A domestic?"James sniffled. He had a desperate look in his eyes now. A longing."You could be the Mistress," James said. "You could be my spiritualguide." I'm not equipped for that," I said."Of course you are. You've always been kind of in charge,. I marked the page with asmall scrap of paper pulled from Amie's trash, marked thepage and tucked the heavy book under my arm. I left herroom and headed down the steps where I laid it on thekitchen table. Every once in a while I would glance at itas I was making my sandwiches for lunch.I drug a soda from the refrigerator and sat it down next toa large bag of chips, reaching out, I turned the book so Icould read while I ate. The words were from a strangelanguage that I couldn't make out... part. I keep some of the pictures from our group sex and such on them. When I drove her home that night (I usually do so the wife can rest, she is tired and needs a shower. We rarely require condoms so she always smells like a cum bucket) she seemed fidgety and ackward until I asked her if something was on her mind. She asked if she could talk to me in confidence. I said "yes", she then shocked me with "should I be worried about my reputation if I fool around with guys who are not my boyfriend?"I.
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